Monday, October 29, 2007

Player Preview: Glen Davis


    Real Name: Ronald
    Born in: Baton Rouge, LA (#7 on my list of places I will never, ever visit, right between #8 Antarctica and #6 Tehran)
    Height: 6'9"
    Weight: 3 bills
    Disturbing Habit: Getting hit by cars
    High School: University HS, Baton Rouge, LA
    College: LSU
    Good Nickname: Big Baby
    Awful and Misleading Nickname: Baby Shaq. He's fatter, slower, less athletic, and less explosive than Shaq. If anyone from Celticsblog wants to argue with me over this- check out this video of Shaq at LSU. He was outrageous.


    Career: Big Baby had a great sophomore year in college, when the LSU Tigers made it to the final four. He botched the semifinal, however, missing almost everything from the field and fouling out. People were talking about him being a top-10 pick. Wisely, he chose to return to college (probably to take 4 credit hours a semester in General Studies), get in a car accident, get triple teamed all season, lead the team to a terrible record and drop into the second round of the draft. Good choice!

    Random Youtube Gem #1: Big Baby swing dancing at a pep rally!


    Random Youtube Gem #2: Big Baby scratching!


    Youtube Clip That Made Me Dislike Big Baby:


    Season Preview: Big Baby appears to be a big-time dick. His interview with the Perkisabeast dudes did not make him look good, IMHO. Actually, he looked like an oversensitive, unintelligent, pampered sissy whose cheeks are so fat he can't speak properly. Plus, I resent the fact that I am forced to like this guy just because he's too lazy to do a sit-up. It irritates me that Big Baby's JOB is to play basketball yet he shows up looking like he's smuggling Big Macs in every fold of fat on his body. Get in shape, fatass. Your vertical leap makes Dan Dickau look like Harold Minor. Get on a Kate Moss diet and you're taking Perkins' minutes. Keep eating like you're preparing for a winterlong hibernation and you'll be taking D-League minutes.

    However, I will admit that I was fired up when the Celtics drafted him. In fact, I remember thinking that it was the part of the Ray Allen trade that tipped the scales in the Celtics' favor. Additionally, he has looked outstanding in the preseason. Sullivan told me that he saw him play in person and he was "surprisingly athletic", and Sullivan knows what he's talking about. Big Baby fills a role that the Celtics desperately need, and that role is "keep Scot Pollard off the floor". He stays close to the block, which is good for spacing on offense, and he tries really, really hard. I hope he continues to develop as quickly as he appears to be right now and works his way into the regular rotation. I know Nic will always be sad that the Celtics botched their "freakishly athletic fatass" search and drafted Big Baby and not the incredible athletic powerhouse Yokozuna, but I think Ronald will deliver enough Banzai drops to change his mind. Source URL: http://ledger-heath.blogspot.com/2007/10/player-preview-glen-davis.html
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