Will Antoine Be On the Celtics?

Jackie Manuel and Dahntay Jones (version 2) were cut the other day, bringing the team's roster to 14. At the same time, Antoine was traded to a team that will suck (T-Wolves). Immediately, we all wondered whether Antoine will be bought out and then join the C's. I doubt this will happen, and I hope it doesn't. Here is why-

1) Antoine was once spry. Now he is fat. His head has grown like Barry Bonds, and it's not because he's getting illegal shipments of HGH, it's because he has been rumored to have a fully-functioning Krispy Kreme restaurant in his living room. We already have Veal and Big Baby, and unless Doc wants to have a better offensive line for when the Celtics scrimmage the Patriots in practice, I don't see how having another guy that can't waddle for 15 seconds without grabbing his knees and wheezing will help. Riley was constantly on his ass to get in shape, and he pretty much never did. How would 'Toine respond to having chocolate sauce put in his water bottles like Big Baby? He would be at Oliver Miller size in two weeks.

2) Eddie House has the job of "chucker" pretty well taken care of. Getting these two on the same team would turn games into old-school McDonald's commercials, only with Antoine attacking the Big Mac like a crackhead in need of a fix.


3) We don't need another ego to disrupt the delicate balance. I'm already nervous about this, and have been since KG said in an interview that the C's were "the Ceatles" and he was "Paul" while P2 sat there looking pissed. I love Antoine, and I know he's gotten a bad rap before, but anyone who thinks that playing in Miami has humbled him is delusional. He has the same shot selection, he just plays fewer minutes! And playing fewer minutes just makes him chubbier! If you don't believe me, head on over to basketball-reference. Per 40 minutes, he shot as many threes as he did at any point in his career, and do you want to know what percentage he shot? You guessed it- 27.5%. Ouch. (I could take this into a separate argument- Why Pat Riley is the most overrated bastard ever- but that's for another day.)

4) I don't see where he would play on the floor.

5) He has never been capable of playing defense.

Basically, if the Celtic want a fat egomaniac that plays no defense and takes tons of terrible shots, Antoine Walker is their man! He basically brings to the table NOTHING that the Celtics need. The Celtics need more discipline, better shot selection, better passing, and better defense. If you're looking to Antoine Walker to give you these things, prepare to be wallowing in a mud pit with him come playoff time.Source URL: http://ledger-heath.blogspot.com/2007/10/will-antoine-be-on-celtics.html
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