A million thanks to Deadspin for this invaluable link. I was left wondering after the recent Donaghy allegations- would Doug Christie's wife allow him to comment on it or would she demand he spend every waking hour planning their upteenth re-wedding? Well, apparently Doug isn't whipped any longer because although he isn't allowed to leave the house without a homing beacon, he's more than welcome to bitterly blog about not getting signed by the Sonics this year. Treasure this blog while you can because as soon as Jackie finds out that someone with two X chromosomes read it you can bet your sweet ass it will be gone.
Anyway, Christie's logic is as follows- if the Kings had gone on to win the title in 2002, people wouldn't think his crazy-ass relationship with his wife was so crazy and he would gain the respect as a "champion", which would allow him to keep playing on crappy teams like the 07-08 Sonics that needed veteran leadership. Trying to stay aboard this crazy train of demented logic takes every ounce of my strength but I am conscripted by a higher power, i.e. IHeartCeltics' Sullivan, to soldier on and mock him as well as I possibly can.
A champion is treated in a whole different light. They are valued in the locker room and commercially on a whole different level. For years, my wife and I have been ridiculed and talked about like we are weird, all because we did not fit the “mold” of what the culture breeds in the NBA. It got to the point that these stories would precede us to the point that teams thought that I (i.e. we) would be a problem. That is bogus!!!! Respecting yourself, your family and being a team player is a problem? The point being that if the series would have went the way we all know that it should have, as a champion my relationship would have been praised because the “champs” are always shown in a good light. Just like now, you see Kobe and many players with their wives and kids right there hugging and kissing, now it’s “chic”…
This is the twisted delusions of a man that has been emotionally worn down by his lunatic wife over many years of constant marriages to the same person. Somehow, he turns this referee scandal into some sort of weird attack on his marriage and his family. Doug, Doug, Doug... everyone would still think you were weird even if you won the title. Dennis Rodman didn't get many good NBA gigs after he won THREE titles. Now, of course, you're weird for mostly the opposite reasons as Rodman- you're weird because your wife won't let you make eye contact with another woman, she follows your team bus calling you incessantly like a crazed stalker, she pummels opposing players with her designer handbags, and she forces you to dress in a separate locker room just in case a female reporter sneaks a peek at your Buck Johnson. If there's a guy at any job that has a wife that calls him a million times a day and threatens female coworkers that talk to him, that becomes a problem right away. The NBA is no different, buddy. Anyway, maybe Christie can steer his prose into a more rational direction.
And not to knock any of the players, I am very pleased and proud that now all of them can feel ok about showing how they feel about their families in public. After my family and I took all of the bullets and were put through hell, our businesses suffered and ultimately the profession that I love so dearly has been taken away with lies and propaganda, just as that series was.
Are you kidding me? Last season (‘07/’08), I go in the gym with the Sonics and Trail Blazers (not to mention the GMs that I spoke to personally) and outplayed 90% of their guys. The only thing my agent told me they were interested in was my relationship with my wife, what happened before, or why did I leave the Clippers??? Truth be told, my family and I were dealing with the same old lies and workers starting trouble with us. I’m not willing to deal with that!
Uh oh! The train has left the rails...
Let's break down the leaps in logic:
1) This is the most egregious one- I doubt that he is outplaying 90% of the players on the Blazers and Sonics considering he hasn't shot above 40% for a season since the 03-04 season. He has played in 14 total games since 04-05 and he's old. There might be a reason or two why teams aren't climbing over each other to sign him. Just sayin'...
2) "What my agent told me" = "How my agent spun the issue" x "The thing that pissed me off the most about what my agent told me." This is much like the guy that tells you he got fired because his boss just didn't like him for some reason. Sure, buddy. People get fired for that all the time, a survey of HR representatives around the country came back saying that "irrational personal vendetta" is the #1 reason for employment termination.
3) "Same old lies and workers starting trouble with us" = "My wife went crazy-go-nuts on some employee/employees" + "My wife and I are incredibly paranoid."
4) When you have the option of signing a guy that shoots under 40% from the field, has basically been out of the league for two years, and has a wife that is notoriously demanding... I think most reasonable people would just go ahead and sign Adrian Griffin instead. You get similar production with 1/1,000 of the drama, and probably for less money.
Now, if Doug was putting up Kobe Bryant numbers, I'm sure 20+ teams would put up with all kinds of his wife's shenanigans... but you don't want your 15th man to be the biggest pain in the ass on the team. This was Joe Forte's problem in Boston. Lots of problems for the team with limited production is a bad combination for anybody, and the Christies have a rap sheet of insanity that goes back a whole decade.
I think, what I tried to get across with this post, was summed up in one swift comment on the blog by Demar:
# Demar says:
June 16th, 2008 at 12:39 pm
Doug, nobody blackballed you, you just suck...and your crazy ass wife is THE REASOn you are not playing, besides sucking.
Amen. This blog has the potential to be a treasure trove of paranoid ramblings once a week! With this referee scandal gaining steam again, we know Doug will be forced to opine. It's the ramblings of a true madman. Stay tuned, folks!
PS. Also, hi to Jackie Christie! I know you Google you and your husband's names several times a day, so thanks for reading! Don't worry, I am not trying to flirt with your husband! Jackie.... JACKIE!!!! Put the Prada bag down!!!!Source URL: http://ledger-heath.blogspot.com/2008/06/how-did-we-miss-this-doug-christie-has.html
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