Ruben Patterson?!?

WE HAVE THREE NO-NONSENSE SUPERSTARS READY TO CONTEND; WHY NOT ADD A NANNY-FONDLING, WIFE-BEATING, RANDOM-DUDE ASSAULTING, ME-FIRST, SELF-AGGRANDIZING, TEAM-KILLING, SEX OFFENDER TO THE TEAM?

This story, being spread by Patterson himself and the Boston Herald, had better not be true. The man is such a criminal he can't even remember to register as a sex offender. Here's what the Herald says:


The Celtics must now resume their search for bench help, with one looming possibility said to be Ruben Patterson, a defensively-tough free agent swingman who played for the Bucks last season.


Here's my main problem with Ruben Patterson- he's a rapist. My second problem is that he's a wife-beating asshole. My third problem is that he called himself a "Kobe Stopper" when, in fact, he was nothing of the sort. This man sucks at life, and he would be a terrible, terrible, TERRIBLE addition to the Celtics. People always rave about his defensive capability and his rebounding. Both are assets... for about three weeks. Then, he methodically tries to either commit a crime embarassing to the franchise or tries to sabotage his team or coach.

Yes, he is a tough player. Unfortunately, when you weigh that with the fact that he will have to register in Massachusetts as a sex offender if he joins the Green, plus he bitches about playing time wherever he goes... and on top of that, he has the AUDACITY to believe that HE is the missing link between the Celtics and banner #17! Ruben Patterson's exhibit fills an ENTIRE WING at that Douchebag Hall of Fame.

Also, for all you "bottom line" people out there... I don't buy the argument that people can separate their personal troubles from their professional performance. Bullshit! Patterson is a VIOLENT CRIMINAL. Let's see, Game 7, Eastern Conference Finals, overtime... do you want a guy on the floor who PUNCHED SOMEONE IN THE FACE BECAUSE HIS CAR GOT SCRATCHED?!? How many people with his rap sheet have gone on to have healthy, long term, positive-impact careers on the basketball court? Not many, jack!

I know what the Herald is doing here. They are proposing a rumor to get people like me all pissed off. It's like taking candy from a baby, or in Ruben Patterson's case, taking advantage of a nanny. However, let me make it clear that even proposing the rumor that Ruben f-ing Patterson would wear the same uniform as Bill Russell is morally reprehensible. So, screw you, rumor-starting guy! Screw you!!!Source URL: http://ledger-heath.blogspot.com/2007/08/ruben-patterson.html
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